Gifts w/ Strings Attached?

Parents often gives their child gifts, but should they ever come with strings attached such as from this one? A contract just for a phone? And around half of the points are moot!

Dear Gregory

Merry Christmas! You are now the proud owner of an iPhone. Hot Damn! You are a good and responsible 13-year-old boy and you deserve this gift. But with the acceptance of this present comes rules and regulations. Please read through the following contract. I hope that you understand it is my job to raise you into a well rounded, healthy young man that can function in the world and coexist with technology, not be ruled by it. Failure to comply with the following list will result in termination of your iPhone ownership.



I love you madly and look forward to sharing several million text messages with you in the days to come.
iPhone with a catch ... part of the 18-point contract.

1. It is my phone. I bought it. I pay for it. I am loaning it to you. Aren't I the greatest?
It's not a gift then, is it?

2. I will always know the password.
Since when is being a child equals to having no privacy?

3. If it rings, answer it. It is a phone. Say hello, use your manners. Do not ever ignore a phone call if the screen reads "Mom" or "Dad." Not ever.
This one's valid, though really, so the kid will have to answer the phone when he's in class, eating, in the toilet, or in public transportation (bus,trains)? Great show of consideration there

4. Hand the phone to one of your parents promptly at 7:30 pm every school night and every weekend night at 9:00 pm It will be shut off for the night and turned on again at 7:30 am. If you would not make a call to someone's land line, wherein their parents may answer first, then do not call or text. Listen to those instincts and respect other families like we would like to be respected.
So everything a child do has to be known by their parents? Jeez! I don't know about you, but in many schools that I know, late night text and calls can be important for schoolwork

5. It does not go to school with you. Have a conversation with the people you text in person. It's a life skill. *Half days, field trips and after school activities will require special consideration.
YAY! If there's ever an emergency such as kidnapping(though I sure hope that doesn't happen) or urgent school notices for you, there's no point in having the phone. What do you think a phone is, parent?

6. If it falls into the toilet, smashes on the ground, or vanishes into thin air, you are responsible for the replacement costs or repairs. Mow a lawn, babysit, stash some birthday money. It will happen, you should be prepared.
Now this one's valid and legit. Instilling a sense of responsibility is a must.


7. Do not use this technology to lie, fool, or deceive another human being. Do not involve yourself in conversations that are hurtful to others. Be a good friend first or stay the hell out of the crossfire.
This one's quite legit too.

8. Do not text, email, or say anything through this device you would not say in person.
3 valid points in a row! Huzzah!

9. Do not text, email, or say anything to someone that you would not say out loud with their parents in the room. Censor yourself.
This one's kinda stupid, really. There's no kid that wants their parents to know exactly what their conversation is like

10. No porn. Search the web for information you would openly share with me. If you have a question about anything, ask a person -- preferably me or your father.
This one's... well, "rules are made to be broken" still holds true. Plus, it's an embarrassing subject, you're the one who have to bring it up, not the kid.

11. Turn it off, silence it, put it away in public. Especially in a restaurant, at the movies, or while speaking with another human being. You are not a rude person; do not allow the iPhone to change that.
Valid point! Though this contradicts your own point 3, silencing it and putting it away means that a lot of times, there will be missed calls and then you're going to be pissed off because the kid follows your rules. Not to mention you'll definitely blame the kid.

12. Do not send or receive pictures of your private parts or anyone else's private parts. Don't laugh. Someday you will be tempted to do this despite your high intelligence. It is risky and could ruin your teenage/college/adult life. It is always a bad idea. Cyberspace is vast and more powerful than you. And it is hard to make anything of this magnitude disappear - including a bad reputation.
Really really valid, it's a bad idea to send pictures of private parts, especially when people can recognize you from it. 

13. Don't take a zillion pictures and videos. There is no need to document everything. Live your experiences. They will be stored in your memory for eternity.
True, people shouldn't go overboard.

14. Leave your phone home sometimes and feel safe and secure in that decision. It is not alive or an extension of you. Learn to live without it. Be bigger and more powerful than FOMO (fear of missing out).
Contradicts point 3.

15. Download music that is new or classic or different than the millions of your peers that listen to the same exact stuff. Your generation has access to music like never before in history. Take advantage of that gift. Expand your horizons.
Valid point

16. Play a game with words or puzzles or brain teasers every now and then.
This one's good too!

17. Keep your eyes up. See the world happening around you. Stare out a window. Listen to the birds. Take a walk. Talk to a stranger. Wonder without googling.
This one's kinda off-topic, I don't even get what does this has to do with his phone.

18. You will mess up. I will take away your phone. We will sit down and talk about it. We will start over again. You and I, we are always learning. I am on your team. We are in this together.
Harsh, but true.

It is my hope that you can agree to these terms. Most of the lessons listed here do not just apply to the iPhone, but to life. You are growing up in a fast and ever changing world. It is exciting and enticing. Keep it simple every chance you get. Trust your powerful mind and giant heart above any machine. I love you. I hope you enjoy your awesome new iPhone.

xoxoxo,

Mom

Though really, the only part that's inappropriate from the contract is the part where he can't bring the phone to school, and he can't have any privacy with the phone.

Here's a good one from joyoftech. A rebuttal to the contract!

How about you? Do you ever give gifts with strings attached? Do you feel that people that give gifts with a contract are good parents or helicopter parents?